Where Did My Life Go?

Seriously. I had some friends over last night to see the play. They spent the night and we ended up watching a movie when we got back. I realized then that I haven't turned on the TV for several weeks before that. I suppose that is good, but I don't feel like I have accomplish a lot either. I am in a Shakespearean play, which I have wanted to do for a while, and I have been busy with school, but it seems like I have not had time to myself. Then I started thinking about where I am in life. As I interact with the high schoolers in the play with me, I can't help but envy them. Some are preparing for the SAT ad ACT, some are narrowing down choices for college, and some are just starting to think about what to do after graduation. They can literally do anything. I realize I have missed my quarter-life crisis by a few years, but I do ponder if this is what I wanted for myself at this time in my life. I am very blessed to life a relatively laid back and stress free life. I credit this to my utter lack of expectation. A little more than a year ago, I had no idea I would be living in Fort Wayne, Indiana. If I were completely honest, I don't know where I will be a year from now. I have really enjoyed the past few years. With a couple of exceptions, my friends are very different from the ones I had two years ago. I am blessed to have a job I like, hobbies that keep me occupied, and friends to be with. I wonder sometimes if these are merely distractions to keep me content until I find what I really want. The problem is I really don't know what I want. A relationship would be nice, but I don't feel a real rush to get in one. I have been single for a couple of years now, but it still feels like I need to learn more about myself before I pursue someone. At the same time, I am surrounded by people who already had kids by the time they were my age. Most of my coworkers got married relatively young, and many of my friends are getting engaged. The thing is, it is very hard to meet new people, or at least spend enough time with someone to determine if you like them. It seems the only way to get to know someone is to ask someone on a date, which I abhor. I would like to meet people, and get to know people as organically as any other relationship, without ay pretense, which is hard. But I need to get on with life, because I missed my quarter life crisis, and I have work to do.