The Way We Live Now

Just finished a play called The Way We Live Now: 25 Years Later. I played several characters that deal with the loss of a loves on from AIDS. The plays were written around the late 80's, when much was still unknown about it, and at a time when the public perception was based on fear, ignorance, and judgement. Much has changed since the plays were written. Absolute terror has been meat with understanding about the disease. No longer is it immediate death sentence. There is no longer a surfeit of pills to take every few hours. The public stance is no longer quite so judgmental. However, there is still no cure. There is still a pill to take everyday, with the risk of becoming ineffectual is a dose is missed. It still dramatically changes one's life. There is still an air of condemnation associated with people who have HIV, even in myself. This is because barring a blood transfusion, rape, or a few rare circumstances, one still must either have sex with someone, or engage in illicit drug use in order to get it. This is not to say that people who have it deserve it, or do not deserve help and counsel for the situation they are in. However they did put themselves in this situation, no matter how unintentionally (even if one thinks it was inevitable). I simply think there are consequences in life, for every action, for every decision. Good, bad, or neutral. This is why I think that we are still not finished educating people about the disease. In fact, one of the fastest growing populations with HIV are people over 60. As the elderly move to Florida to retire, many are widowed, and are looking for companionship. No longer worried about an unwanted pregnancy, many forego the use of protection. This was the generation where the worst risk from having sex was getting pregnant. Unfortunately we live in scarier times, and education is our most powerful weapon against these new threats.
This play has forced me to reconcile myself with a few of my perceptions about the disease. At the end of each performance, we had a representative from the AIDS Task Force, including Gregory Manifold, the executive director. I have learned about the different perspectives about how the attitude has changed since the 80's. I think it was most important to listen to the people living with HIV and hear their stories. They are not terrified of the disease. It has changed their lives, but many are determined live full lives.
One man after one of the last performances said he knows he will not die from AIDS. He was diagnosed with HIV in 1987, at the age of 22. He was in college, and was faced with the fact that within 5 years he would be dead. He is also homosexual, and faced with the shame of telling his family and some of his friends that not only his lifestyle is not acceptable to them, but that he has HIV. He turned to drug use, alcohol, and other things to escape his depression and slim outlook. He eventually got help, got his life turned around, and started taking care of himself. Nearly 25 years later, he is healthy, and an advocate for AIDS education. He says he will now die os AIDS. He will die of cancer, or heart disease, or one of the many other afflictions that eventually will get us in the end. Imagine the strange comfort of being determined to die of cancer.